Single for the Holidays? Here are a few tips!

Ahh! The holiday szn. Decorative lights, upbeat music, and pumpkin spice-infused everything. For many, the last few months of the year are a beautiful way to reconnect with family, set new personal goals, and show immense gratitude for all we have. For others, the holiday time can be a period of forced reflection and loneliness. If you’re single for the holidays, do not fret. There are plenty of ways to tap into the energy of love and fullness, even if you don’t have a partner. Let’s talk about the ways we can make the most of the holiday time (sans romantic partner).

Boundaries with Family: Get ready for those invasive comments and questions. Sometimes family has a way of touching on sore wounds. Having a few boundary phrases in your back pocket can help keep you safe and deflect from comments/questions that may feel hurtful. Try a few boundary statement such as “I am actually staying focused on myself and my career this year, and limiting distractions”. There are respectful ways we can deny our loved ones’ requests for more information. Keep in mind, our family and friends usually just want what is best for us. They are inquiring about things as a way to show their support and prove engagement in our lives. After executing your boundary, make sure to show them a bit of compassion.

Keep Celebrating Where The Love Is: Say YES to opportunities to connect! Go to Friendsgivings. Bring your BFF as your plus 1 to the holiday party. Reconnect with distant cousins and family members. Go to a holiday show or parade and meet new people. It is easy to seep into inactivity, when we feel like romantic relationships are a prerequisite for our happiness. When there is no one to join us, we make excuses to skip out on things that would otherwise bring us joy. Even if we are alone for the holidays, we still are deserving of love and celebration. That can still be with other people, or even alone. To the best of your ability, fill your life with the people who make you feel full and appreciate you. Find inventive ways to keep the cheer.

Create Personalized Traditions: You don’t need a significant other to have holiday traditions. Figure out a few individualized practices that you can incorporate as a part of your holiday season. These are things that you don’t need anyone else for, and find beauty in doing alone. For example, buy yourself three holiday presents. Other examples of this are: decorating your home, going to see holiday lights, yearly holiday baking, volunteering at a local shelter, taking a weekend trip somewhere, taking a few extra days off work, taking social media detox, or completing a puzzle. This is a yearly way to reconnect with yourself and your interests, optimize some alone time, and build up a practice that is yours to keep.